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March 29, 2007

C'mon, Khadeeja - You Can Drop That Veil for Me

Guest editorial by Kyle Rasmussen,
Ohio State Class of 2009

Ever since you walked into Comp I last fall, Khadeeja, I knew that you were something special. And your soft white veil, which hid most of your face except your eyes, drove me crazy when I should have been taking notes on annotated bibliographies and shit.

All I can think of is lifting that hijab and seeing the beauty I know is underneath. So what do you say, Khadeeja - how's about dropping that veil for me?

From what I can see, you have a great body, too. I hope it's OK for me to compliment you on how sexy you are. You're not going to send a bunch of jihaddist-looking cousins after me for saying that, are you?

Phew! That's good. Anyways, maybe we could get together and go out to eat some night. I know this great babrbecue place on Broad Street that's open late. We could eat, maybe have a couple of beers, and hit one of the dance clubs, and I could get a look under that whole khimār deal.

Wait! Don't go. I also wanted to say that I'm, like, totally sorry for all that Iraq shit, and I think the Palestinians got a really bad deal there way back when, and you people have every right to be mad at the United States and all.

Well, all right. I understand. Sometimes I say some goofy things. Listen - you got any hot cousins you could set me up with? 'Cuz I'm really down with the brown, if you know what I mean.

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