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February 20, 2007

Fraternity Launches "Condiments for the Homeless" Drive

leftover condiment packets Left: Initial stash of stray condiments

(Columbus, OH) Members of the OSU chapter of Sigma Phi Epsilon have started a "unique humanitarian effort" designed to aid area homeless shelters.

Entitled "Condiments for the Homeless," the volunteer campaign seeks to match those in need with those who have plenty, said fraternity president Allen Jacobs.

"Pretty basically, we saw that our main refrigerator was 'busting at the seams,' shall we say, with leftover ketchup, soy sauce, and Taco Bell sauce packets," he said, filling a grocery bag with the condiments. "We got to thinking that there were probably many frats and sororities with the same problem, and a lot of homeless people who have no relish packs for whatever food those people get fed."

Jacobs said that the SigEps took the idea to the Greek Council, and the rest "was like history."

"Our Greek brothers and sisters have really stepped up and answered the call," he said. "We have almost a trunk full of these valuable food accoutrements to take to the homeless shelter downtown, and you have to know there's a lot of good nutrition in this stuff. Plus, we only take packets that have been refrigerated, not like left in the glove box or anything."

Left: SigEps pose for group photo

Jacobs said that the brothers of SigEp "pride themselves" on eliminating the “Animal House” reputation that is often associated with fraternities.

"Sigma Phi Epsilon is designed to promote leaders as well as gentlemen," he proudly added. "We feel that we have, in some small way, helped bring a little light into the lives of the less fortunate, as well as making progress on cleaning out our skanky fridge."

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If I was homeless I would throw that shit right back at those frat fags.
Were these sh**heads drunk when they thought this one up?
What a bunch of complete stooges!
its satire, idiots
What a bunch of self ritious douchebags
Imagine if you were homeless... you'd want a little more flavor on your food too! Good going guys, we need more citizens like you!
Self ritious? You're just jealous because you failed university!
even though it seems condescending it does probably work out in the end. i would not be suprised if they had crappy condiments or none at all in soup kitchens and shelters, and condiments are most needed with crappy food (which it probably is). still, you consider smoking a little less weed
Ronald Reagan said ketchup is a vegetable, but I am not sure what food group mustard and mayo would be in.
As a homeless person, I must say that I was moved to the point of poetry by your generous program.

I like mustard
it's better than custard.
If I don't get some
I get real flustered.

God bless. You spice up my life!
While their wording could have been a lot more eloquent, I think their hearts were in the right place. Homeless shelters typically do not have many luxuries like condiments, which most of us take for granted. Charity has to start somewhere, and someday these boys may end up running a charitable foundation.
i wonder how many of you commentors were dumb enough to think this was real.
So.... Let me get this straight.... You are giving taco sauce? What about the taco? or the hot dog for your, oh so altrustic, donation of relish? Hell, throw in some sushi....

I think you should GIVE FOOD to your homeless shelter and not some soy sauce.

Very Marie Antoinette of you guys, bravo....
Hear ye! Hear ye! It doesn't matter whether or not this is/isn't real, because all the critics who haven't done anything for homeless people, can shut their f*cking mouths. I've worked in a homeless shelter before on Thanksgiving and Christmas and these people don't have the luxury of condiments. If you had any idea what these people eat on a daily basis, you'd know they would suck someones d*ck for a packet of ketchup to go with their dirt sandwich.
Dirt sandwich? You're obviously quite the humanitarian, sir. Real or not, this is pretty much the way frats act at OSU, so it's not really out of character.
Ahhh, satire, nothing like it to show how stupid some people are.
many of you can't spell, really... say it with me

R I G H T E O U S. not ritious, people,
This actually makes me a little embarrassed to be a student at OSU and one of these dumbasses is in my class and I'm going to make a point of ridiculing him mercilessly and assuring him that the homeless would much rather have the BMW his daddy bought him than some effing sauce packets.
THIS IS NOT A REAL ARTICLE!!! This brotherhood ACTUALLY has been ohio state's chapter of the year for several years, and does much work volunteer work throughout the year to assist the Columbus community.

Stop thinking that fraternity men/sorority women automatically are "rich" and "daddy's boy's/girls". Many people join those organizations to become more involved and develop their leadership. It is a shame that instead of doing something positive yourself, you sit on here and bash students who are actually trying to do something.
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