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December 15, 2007

I’m Like, Totally Going to Blast this Prof on MySpace

By Gina Vickers
University of Michigan Sophomore


Vickers: An Enraged But-Her-Face


You know, I’ve totally respected Dr. Stoutmire this semester because his lectures are energetic, he shows all students the same degree of respect, and he never strays from his syllabus.

But since he gave me a D on my final essay of the semester, I’m totally going to blast his fucking ass on MySpace’s “grade your professors” section.

First of all, I have never gotten a D in my entire life, so how could I possibly get one now? Also, I’ve never missed a single day of Stoutmire’s class. Not one. And fourthly, I’m like…I always send him really nice emails when he gives awesome lectures.

So the only thing I can figure is that Stoutmire has been a closet dick-hole and secretly hated me all semester, and now he’s bringing out the claws since we did faculty evaluations last week and he can just be a vengeful prick now.

You know what bothers me the most, though? I turned that paper in a DAY EARLY. That’s right. Even with all these other kids skipping and giving excuses and being sketchy with their immaturity I got my paper in early. How could any good teacher punish that? Only Stoutmire could, and that’s why I’m going to be the bigger person and tell everyone on MySpace why he’s a fucking jerk and no one should ever take him ever.

Ugh. I need to go finish my laundry. Just thinking about how I spent a whole hour on that paper only to get a D makes me sick. Toodles!

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