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May 25, 2007

Student Worried Girlfriend's Gay Roommate Will "Make Her Go Dyke"

(Ann Arbor, MI) By all accounts Lindsay Toussaint is a "great person" who gets along with everyone, said Terrance Reeger.

"I mean, she likes awesome music, manages a busy work and social life, and cleans up after herself," Reeger admitted.

Unfortunately, Toussaint is openly lesbian, and that fact has Reeger worried for her roommates, especially his girlfriend Katie Putnam.

"I didn't think anything about it until I saw Katie and her hug just before Lindsay got on the train to go home for the summer," he recalled. "There was something, well, just too gay about the way them held on to each other. I was really uncomfortable."

Reeger said that there have been "way too many times" Lindsay was demonstrably affectionate with Katie this school year.

"One time I came over and they were lying on the floor watching TV, and their feet were, like, almost touching and stuff," he said, visibly agitated at the memory. "It wasn't like they were playing footsie, but I was getting the vibe that I just walked in on some kind of lesbian foot-game."

Lesbian Lindsay, second from right, probably getting eight kinds of horny during this picture with dorm roommates

Reeger said that his "worst fear" is that Lindsay will turn his girlfriend into a lesbian.

"Look - I know it's not contagious or anything. At least I hope not," he noted. "Still, anything can happen after a person gets a little tipsy, like if somebody's gay friend was alone with him in the garage when they were supposed to be working on changing a starter on his '88 Mustang and they ended up having this wild man-on-man sex in the back seat of the car, hot sweat in the August afternoon after a couple of beers, tasting another man's salty balls and jizz and that person thinks about that afternoon forever. I'm just saying, right?"

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