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June 13, 2006

Student Shaves Head to Hide From Psycho Ex-Girlfriend

Left: Marked man

(Austin, TX) Junior pharamacy major Steve Jericho said that he never realized "what a freaking psycho" his ex-girlfriend Meredith Copeland was until the couple broke up.

"It's like something out of 'Fatal Attraction,' except Meredith is kind of skanky," he said. "When I came home from work the other night, I found her naked on my bed wearing pig tails and saying: 'Spank me, Daddy.' I just can't live like this."

Jericho said that Meredith has been showing up in completely unexpected places.

"I was looking to do some shopping last week when she showed up dressed like a mall security guard," he said. "While biting on my ear she asked if I wanted a full cavity search. I just don't know why she thinks getting all freaky will somehow win me back."

Left: Copeland, biding her time

Among other changes, Jericho is thinking of adding a pair of glasses and a wardrobe change.

"I have to make sure that I coordinate all of this with an address change," he said. "She may be nuts, but she could have been a detective. She totally figured out how to convince the operator to give her my unlisted number."

Contacted by Codependent Collegian, Copeland denied that she has done anything "unusual."

"Steve's just going through a little phase. This will all pass," she smiled. "Once he realizes that we were meant to be together - no, DESTINED to be together - everything will be fine again."

She paused for a moment, and turned back to reporters before walking away.

"That, or I'll slice off his testicles," she said.Ann Coulter Pirate Bay Macbook Loretta Nall ring tones

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