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April 14, 2006

Patrick Henry College to Count Irish, Italians as Minorities

By Codependent Collegian contributor Feckless Freddie

(Purcellville, VA) Stung by charges that the school is a racist enclave, the board of trustees at Partick Henry College voted to amend the institution's standards regarding minorities.

From hence forward, the school will consider persons of Irish and Italian descent as minorities.

"For me personally, this is exactly the right thing for me to be doing at this stage of my life, and I believe our students feel the same way," said Mitchell Farriss, college president. "For me, nothing could be more rewarding than teaching minorities, especially if we can accomplish this goal without bringing blacks or Hispanics on campus."

Farriss believes that there is a Divine presence in his work.

"I believe that God is indeed at work here at Patrick Henry College. His hand is evident in every facet of the college - from the white columns to the white paper upon which we write our white thoughts," he said. "And it resonates in our daily chapel, where the truth of God's Word is applied to the issues facing white people today."

Farriss said that there is an "epic struggle" underway in which Patrick Henry is involved.

"At first, my goal was simply to help white people hang onto a vestige of freedom, so they could train their children in righteousness and liberty," he said. "But I have since come to believe that those white children will make a truly significant impact upon our nation-the most significant impact since our nation's founding. I believe we are raising a generation of white people who will stand out as a godly remnant in tomorrow's society, ready to reclaim the biblical principles upon which our white land was founded." Proof Eminem

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