Codependent Collegian

(East Lansing, MI) Freshman engineering student Marshall Scheiber sits dejectedly at the back of a classroom in the Chemistry building.

"I can't believe how hard this shit is," he muttered, staring at his shoes. "Nobody ever told me I would have to read textbooks and do all this work."

Scheiber partly blames the MSU orientation guides for the problem.

"Yeah, they walked us around, showed us the football stadium, rec center, and student union," he said. "But they never said anything about how hard these midterms are. Fuckers."

Back in high school, Scheiber said, a few teachers warned him about the differences between secondary and college settings.

"They said all of that in junior high, too, so I figured they were just trying to scare us," he said. "They should have been more clear that they weren't bullshitting around."

Scheiber believes college professors are "totally unsympathetic" to the plight of freshmen like him.

"We have it pretty tough - books to read, lectures to go to, and all we really want is to have a measly five minutes a day for socializing," he said. "They act like we have nothing else to do but their stupid assignments. You should have seen this prof freak out when I got a cell phone call the other day - she acted like I fucking stabbed her with a knife!"."brrreeeport krugle