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October 2, 2005

Ritter Planetarium To Offer Views Of Old Orchard Women

Left: UT students checking out the hotties on Drummond Road

(Toledo, OH) UT's Ritter Planetarium, suffering from budget woes and weak attendance, has decided to spice up its programming with a new series: "Women of Old Orchard."

Alvin Marak, associate director of the planetarium, said that the planetarium had to invest in low-power telescopes for the event.

"The six-inch Brashear refractor under the twelve-foot Ash dome was just too much for through-the-bedroom-window viewing," said Marak. "We bought a dozen $69 WalMart telescopes for peeping."

Marak said that the Old Orchard neighborhood was chosen for several reasons.

"First, it's real close, being just across Bancroft," he said. "Second, there are a lot of hot-looking soccer moms over there, so we thought we'd tap into the Desperate Housewives thing."

Marak said the exhibit was not without difficulties.

"One woman saw us peeping last week and called the cops," he said. "We thought we were busted until the cops started looking, too. They've been back every night since."

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